It's in the stars
by lexwrites
Summary: Quinn realizes she has never been in a loveless marriage.


On a calm, warm summer night, which they both looked forward to all winter, Rachel decided to drop a bomb on her wife.

Everything was normal. A cozy breeze played with their hairs while the silence that was then ruling was mostly comfortable. Quinn had a beer in her hand and Rachel's homemade peach ice tea was resting on a garden table that they bought when they first moved into that house. They were both reveling in the view of the stars; Rachel because she had dreamed so long about the city that she never parted from the sky and Quinn because of a poet inside her.

The stars often inspired her to write once they get into the house somewhere around midnight, when they realized how late it actually was; they both had work in the morning and none wanted to be exhausted then.

"May I ask you a serious question?" Rachel asked that night, turning to the blonde woman beside her for just a second before looking up once again.

"Of course." Quinn answered swiftly, not really being into it like she always tried to be.

"Do you want kids?" Fast and quiet question was almost impossible to understand but her wife could decipher it rapidly, having been used to it over the past years. The four words left her speechless for a moment, while she remembered how it all started.

She remembered, then, how she had tried, for two years, to get Rachel away from Finn or any other boy, planning to draw her closer to herself. Planning to get the girl who was destined to get out of Lima, Ohio.

When her friend knocked on her door during the winter vacation, it was unexpected but she quickly recovered from the initial shock when she noticed Rachel had been crying. Even then, denied until just now, Quinn never could resist tears coming from her wife.

That night, she found out that the tall jock, who she never really liked, had broken up with the singer. She had convinced herself that then was probably the only time she would get a chance to ever make a move.

The kiss happened spontaneously, even though it was very much planned. Once Rachel's sobs were reduced, the brunette lifted her head to look at Quinn, who then rapidly got the urge to write, seeing the sparkles in Rachel's eyes as the stars on the sky this particular night.

The slow and soft kiss turned into a lustful and passionate one without hurry. The fight of their tongues intrigued Quinn in a way that she can't yet describe with words. They parted only after both of them were almost out of breath.

It's now almost unimaginable to Quinn that that was the moment when she found herself falling fast for Rachel.

Then she reflected on the first day of school after the holidays when Rachel, who was in Quinn's bed with her, had tried to talk her out of coming out to the whole school. But Quinn insisted, saying how she wanted to be honest to the world, how she wanted to learn from Rachel and follow her path in that way.

Their sleepovers became very frequent over just two weeks and it was not strange that Rachel had fallen asleep surrounded by Quinn's arms. The morning came quickly for Quinn and, as Rachel awoke, she placed a signature kiss on top of her head before letting the brunette sit up, along with her. She had to convince her girlfriend she really wanted to tell everyone and that no one was forcing her to do it; after twenty-five minutes, she had succeeded in doing so.

Judy, Quinn's mother, was the first one to know and, while she was a bit taken back with her daughter's leniency, she was uncharacteristically fine with their relationship.

They had walked into the school holding hands, paying absolutely no attention to the whispers that started immediately. The cross looks weren't as hard to ignore as Quinn had then though they would be.

Their friends were mostly happy for them but found the situation very odd and had asked several questions about it. Finn, of course, was not content at all but they brushed him off easily and moved on soon after.

At that moment, unaware just until tonight, Quinn had realized that she was the one that needed the truth coming out sooner more than her wife.

She came across the memory of the first signs of true love and silently cursed herself for not seeing it before.

All these years, she had been persuading herself that it was all just an act when, in reality, she had been head over heels for Rachel very much since their first kiss. She doesn't know now how she didn't see it before.

When they exchanged their 'I love you's', it was her that said it first. Out of nowhere, just like the question that she has yet to answer. It was their graduation day when she initiated the words. She came to her girlfriend's house like arranged and found the brunette worrying about her valedictorian speech.

In the middle of her talk about how Rachel would do just fine and how she needed to relax, she let it slip, successfully silencing the girl next to her. It was a short silence though, before she could enjoy hearing those same words back.

She didn't admit it to herself until now, but every time, without exception, she had heard the words coming out flawlessly out of Rachel's mouth, she felt a warm, almost too comfortable, feeling around her heart. That would be a good enough sign for someone that it wasn't just pretending but not for her.

When she had gotten down on her knee and proposed was what came next on her mind. It was almost unavoidable to miss the happiness that she truly felt at the moment Rachel had said yes.

She had consciously accepted the fact that she would be stuck in a loveless marriage but actually never felt like that.

Dream job, dream girl, modest house, she has all that she has ever wanted but now, when she had accepted the fact that she was in love with her wife, she suddenly found herself needing more.

"I know we haven't talked about it but I want them. Two, at least. I didn't want to freak you out, we have time. I just wanted to know." Rachel brings her back to tonight, having panicked that she scared her.

"It's okay, love. I want a bigger family, too." She says and smiles at the brunette reassuringly, showing brightly her contentment and, for the first time, letting herself enjoy being in love with her wife, Rachel Berry.


End file.
